Welcome to the world of Disney’s newest movie, Encanto. Encanto tells the story of Mirabel Madrigal, who was born into a magical family where everyone has a special gift. These special gifts are given as a child to each family member, and each family member is to use their powers to help others within the community they live. Mirabel is a hard-working, loving, and charismatic part of the Madrigal family; the only difference is that she didn’t get a special power… yet. Encanto takes us through multiple generations of Madrigal family members and their roles within the family system. It shines a light on a multitude of dynamics that can be simplified to one word; dysfunction. Encanto brought out the mirror and handed it to us. It was met with tears and an uplifting message, so how can we share that with our children who just can’t stop talking about Bruno? 

First, let’s talk about the cultural and racial representation within this movie. Most children are seeing versions of themselves for the first time in a Disney movie. Heart-warming posts have been spreading about hair texture, skin color, and body portrayal that are leaving kids and their parents feeling a little bit more accepted in the world. Your child can watch Encanto knowing that they do belong and there are characters in movies that appropriately show how we are each beautifully made. 

Continuing with the immense amount of layers that is Encanto we can discuss the heart-wrenching experience of generational trauma. Alma, the grandmother and true matriarch of the family goes through an immense amount of pain and loss when her husband sacrifices his life to protect Alma and their baby triplets. This is already too much to bear and as we continue along with the story we see Alma, with good intentions, push perfection and pain-stacking work to show appreciation for the gifts they have been given. So how does this affect yourself and your child?

When trauma happens, we naturally build walls of protection whether that looks like our children struggling to self-regulate or starting to isolate or parents needing more obedience from children. We all struggle. Alma showed her best intentions of keeping up with the demands of the community all the while working her family’s abilities to the breaking point. Alma felt it was her sole responsibility to uphold the family. Little did she know that asking for help would open up the family dialogue and save them. Think about the last time you felt you needed to carry the world on your shoulders? Think about how the Madrigal family responded when their home was destroyed? They worked together and contributed as a team, as a family.  

One lesson we can learn from Encanto is sharing the load of life. Asking your children to contribute to the household is not asking for too much if we do it in a way that is kind and firm. Alma felt like she was doing a lot on her own, although her family was actually struggling. If families can come together and discuss the needs of the household, we can better spread the responsibilities. 

Following this train of thought, expecting perfection and constant movement from all family members leads to burn out. Our children truly struggle with carrying the weight of a 21st century experience as much as the parent does.  Taking time to consider what is truly necessary for our children and ourselves to accomplish can start the change. Do you sometimes struggle with wanting the house to be organized and guest-ready all the time or do you find yourself wanting more calm and cooperative kiddos? If you find yourself at your wit’s end over and over again, think of Alma when Maribel was trying to comfort and validate her family members. Alma couldn’t see her family was struggling all the while Maribel was helping her family take a much-needed break from their expected roles. 

Your kids’ mood and behaviors can have a direct relation to how tapped out they feel. Both you and your children might just need a good ole break. Can we sit down and comfort and support one another instead of noticing our faults? It can be so healing, as Encanto shows, to accept all aspects of our character, not just our strengths. 

Lastly, each member of the Encanto family represents an area of struggle and some say even mental health issues. Maribel is surrounded by a magical family wherein she has no visible magical talents- the belief I don’t feel good enough and I don’t fit in. Or the infamous Bruno is the one who is cast aside due to being a part of a traumatic experience that the family no longer wants to remember. Isabela is labeled as perfect which creates an unhealthy obsession with needing to have all aspects of herself and her life perfect, no matter what. Luisa provides physical strength to accomplish many tasks others cannot or do not want to do, this forces her to over extend and ultimately feel inferior to everything that is required of her. Julieta has been gifted with healing any and all wounds which leads to feeling responsible for all ailments and needing to “fix” everyone. Pepa can create tornadoes and struggles to keep her composure which leads to feelings of guilt when she expresses any emotions other than happiness. Dolores finds herself in the middle of most of the drama and has to hold a lot of information in order to keep the peace, this can lead to being pulled in too many directions. 

There are many more characters but there is proof here that there’s a heck of a lot to notice and learn from in regards to Encanto. The songs may be catchy and the storyline heart felt but try watching it again and think about the dynamics in your household. Are some similar or different? 

It’s never too late to sit down as a family and explore some wants and needs that may unknowingly not be being met.